Summer for the Smiths 2018- Teenagers in the house

Summer officially starts tomorrow if you follow that on the calendar BUT the change of schedule happened for us at the first of June—no more school until August!  When our girls were little I would make schedules and plan our days- Make it Monday, Reading Wednesdays and so on.  But our girls are now both teenagers (eekkk!) and our schedules are all over the place.  Even my schedule was crazy these last two weeks as I was presenting at conferences, leading professional development (pd) and getting my own credits for pd.

I still was trying to figure out how to get our girls doing some things that don’t come naturally to them when they make their own to-do lists each day.  My goal was to get them doing the things that I would usually harp on them about doing but without the harping!  Then it hit me…

Duh Becki—you share with teachers the importance of voice and choice in the classroom, how is that not different at home?  One easy way to do this in the classroom is to use choice boards that I always say are “teacher directed and kid approved”.  The teacher sets up the tasks but the students get to choose what they do on the board. So I sat down and created a choice board for our girls.  I used the Tic-Tac-Toe grid but it is four in a row rather than 3.  I set the board up working to make sure in each row and diagonal there were a variety of tasks: reading, creating, intrapersonal, active and yes…some math practice too!

I rolled it out tonight and it was received as well as anything with teenagers can be received 🙂 There were a few moans about some of the tasks and I expected that.  My response was “you don’t have to do that one—it is up to you.”  That is the beauty, the tasks are there and if they want some extra spending money is is theirs for the taking.

I will have to come back and update at the end of the summer to let you know the reality of the plan.

I posted a template below—try it at your house if you would like!

Smith Family Tic-Tac-Toe Template

 

Enjoy your family—hope your summer is made in the shade,

Becki

Making time for Family time

The school year is well underway (finally after start two brought to us by Hurricane Harvey) and life is at that crazy-busy level.  It is our “normal” and I am thankful for the clubs, classes, Bible studies, and parties my girls are able to be involved in, yet finding time to reconnect as a family can be T-O-U-G-H.

Sundays set the tone for the week.  Sundays are a special day—that is how God intended it.  We all need a Sabbath, a day set aside for rest and worship.  Our Sundays can still be crazy though.  How can we carve out Sabbath time as a family on our Sundays when…

• we have church in the morning,
• a quick lunch all together before Brad heads off to his second job—thanks Babe!
• the girls finish up the last of homework not completed on Saturday and then run off to Bible Studies at different locations
• No one is home at dinner time and one child has dinner at Bible Study, the other snacks herself silly and Mom and Dad are running the roads to pick up everyone

I reflected on this and realized that in December our family makes time to have an Advent devotional and prayer time each Sunday night so why not do the same EVERY Sunday.  We love our time in December so let’s make it work for year-round.

I have decided that if we can’t have dinner together on Sunday night that at least we can have dessert.  I make sure we have something to snack on while we meet to reflect on our week ahead, discuss our time at church earlier in the day and then have prayer time as a family.  It has been a sweet time of fellowship.  It gives us time as a family to share concerns, laugh together and plan the week so the week can run more smoothly.

Sometimes I make an “involved” recipe dessert like the one Heather and I made a few week’s ago, salted caramel brownies, and then other times I pick up a box of “just add water” scones from Trader Joe’s and throw together the easy and well-loved “Fall Munchie Mix” (A box of golden grahams, mini-marshmallows, Reese’s Pieces, and chocolate chips all combined in a bowl!).

Easy desserts for our family time- Trader Joe Scones and Fall Munchie Mix

 

How do you connect as a family when life is crazy-busy?  Leave a comment and let’s share our collective genius!!!

Lights and Dust

This morning I was able to get up before the rest of my family for some rare time to myself.  I made coffee, I cleaned up some dishes left soaking from the night before, and I spent some time with the Lord.  Then I decided to open the blinds to let the sun shine in and sit down to quietly play some Christmas carols on the piano.

As I sat down, I noticed dust on the top of the piano.  Dust!???  I had recently dusted.  I had checked the house over before we hosted a gathering the night before and I had not seen dust.  Where had the dust come from?  The dust had been there but now  the light was shining in.

God then reminded me that He shines light in the darkness and reveals our sins and weaknesses.  Those sins and weaknesses are there, within us.  Many times we live life, day to day, without ever acknowledging them or even realizing how they are hurting us.  Then God sends the light to reveal what the darkness has hidden.

Acts 26:18

to open their eyes so that they may turn from darkness to light and from the dominion of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and an inheritance among those who have been sanctified by faith in Me.’

I was reminded how we have to daily open the blinds and  then dust.  I have to daily take time with the Lord to ask him to reveal what is keeping me from knowing Him better.  Then I have to ask forgiveness and change my behavior.

I am so thankful for The Light.  This time of year the entire world loves looking at lights…..Christmas lights on trees and those decorating yards.  I pray that as you take in the seasonal lights that you remember The Light that we are actually celebrating.  God sent his son, The Light, as a baby to deliver us from our darkness of sin that separates us from Him.

Isaiah 9:2

The people who walk in darkness Will see a great light; Those who live in a dark land, The light will shine on them.

So get out the dust rag and get rid of the dust that the light reveals.

Let the light reveal the dust and then get rid of the dust!

Homework Tray is Ready but We Aren’t!

School is about to kick into full swing here in Texas. We have purchased school supplies, been talking about expectations and soaking up every last bit of summer we can!

Homework is an inevitable part of having kids in school. One thing that I put together this month as we prepare to get back into our school routine is a homework tray. I love this more than the homework “bucket” we have had before. Now everything sits on the tray and we can easily pick it up and move everything quickly if we need to use the table.

I bought a nice tray on clearance at Target and then loaded it up with a magazine file where the girls can put items that Mom and Dad need to see/sign, pens, pencils, erasers, sharpeners, rulers, notecards, post-its, scissors….just about anything that is a “normal” homework need.

I love the way it turned out but I’m not in a rush to try it out.

#NotAFanOfHomework

#SoakingUpSummerABitLonger

Supplies are ready, but we aren’t!

August 10- a day I will always remember

Today is one of those “anniversary” days for me.  It is one that I will always remember for the rest of my life.

It is the day we picked up our girls, in 2013, from Sleep-Away camp in Pennsylvania for the last time. It was the day that we told them three very big things:

1) Uncle Dude and Aunt Erin were going to have a baby

2) Aunt Robin died during the night after battling cancer

3) We had decided that I would not accept a job in Texas that had been offered to me….a job that would have allowed us to live just an hour from our extended family.

August 10 is quite the anniversary for me.

This year I remember the day while sitting in Texas, our new residence….where God has provided a job for Brad and now, pending a written offer, a job for me. We moved into our home a week ago and live just over an hour from our extended family. Last year, I had no idea how it would all happen but we decided to Trust God and Walk Forward, knowing He had a plan for us. Knowing if we trusted Him, we would end up in just the right place….wherever that would be.

Today we visited a new church….I hate church shopping but it is a necessary evil of moving. The preacher was the highlight of the church for me, even with all its wonderful amenities. His sermon was a perfect confirmation of our desire to move back to Texas.

He preached from Colossians 3:20-21. His first point was “Make the relationships with our family of primary importance.” This entire move was based on this need of family. Our schedule in Pennsylvania did not allow us to interact as a family on a regular basis. Brad’s job was a great job, but the hours were not conducive to his being around at the times our girls were home. We did not like this. We had seen the warning flags that the pastor, Dr. Mark Hartman, shared

• When the busy seasons become the norm.
• When we connect our careers with our self-worth
• When we stop fighting the battle of balance and give in to the career.

We saw these flags beginning to fly in our lives and didn’t want to overlook them and carry on.

I am thankful that God gave Brad and I the same desire, to find a job that allowed him to have a more consistent schedule to be home in the evenings. We know that our girls are growing up and we will never have this time again….we want to be the parents God has asked us to be. We also wanted our girls to know and be able to develop relationships with their extended family, as family is such an important part of life.

For us, this meant some big changes in career, location, and finances.

Moving is tough. We miss our friends, we have worked for hours packing boxes and now unpacking boxes and I won’t even mention the money involved in a move—ouch!

God is faithful and He provides.

I know He will provide new friends.

I know He will provide rest.

I know that He will provide for our needs.

 

Philippians 4:19

“And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”

I hope to always be able to remember August 10 as a day that is bittersweet; mixed emotions and God’s hand always at work.

Hearing about a new cousin on the way!

Celebrating the life of my Aunt Robin. I miss her so much.

Eating lunch in our new home….no Burger King this time but Whataburger!

Rainbow over our new hometown.

Hey Math Teacher…when will I use this stuff?

Yes, that is often the thought of many a math student sitting in the desk of math classes around the world. Well, let me tell you when you will use “this stuff”. Currently my life seems to be one big story problem; and the answers are not written at the back of the book!

We are excitedly looking to move back to Texas in the next few weeks. God has generously answered the prayers of many people and opened the doors for us to move back close to family. Right now, though, we constantly have to figure out all kinds of things:

• If we have to be in Texas by x-date yet our belongings will be picked up on y-date and it takes so many hours to get to Texas, how many hours do we need to travel each day? (Make consideration for traveling with two cats)
• If our insurance ended on June 30 and the COBRA information arrives on July 11 and is RIDICULOUSLY high, which short-term insurance plan should we go with taking into consideration the maintenance medications we are using and that our family will be traveling in two different directions in three different vehicles across the nation in just two weeks?
• How many jobs do I apply for in the short amount of time I have to sit at the computer and give to that task?

I could go on and on. I am getting many opportunities to quote Philippians 4:6 to myself…I’ve paraphrased it a bit to fit my situations though:

Be anxious for nothing, not even finding the right job,

Be anxious for nothing, not even how you will get all of this done,

but with prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God.

 So the recipe for life is to start each day with Thanksgiving.

Thank you Lord for this move!

Thank you Lord for the opportunity to watch you work.

Thank you Lord for guiding each step of the way.

Thank you for the amazing friends and relatives that are all helping out in their own ways.

Thank you for being so amazing and loving me even when I don’t deserve it.

 

The answers are in the book…His book….the Bible.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

 

So when in doubt, go to the best book around, The Bible and seek his help with the story problems of life.   The answers are not at the back of the book but all throughout, from start to finish!  Then, as Philippians 4:7 goes on to say “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

 

Back to packing!

 

 

Change of Seasons

Saying that this has been a hard winter is quite the understatement. Heck, it is technically spring yet the winter weather still is hanging around.  We moved into our current home just a few days after Christmas. The week after we moved in the snow came and it didn’t leave our yard until well into March. I have never in my life lived with so much snow for so many days. I didn’t like it. I didn’t want it….but I survived. On one of the not-so-bleak days this winter, my handsome fella and I went for a walk. We noted that the evergreen trees were a nice addition to the landscape in the neighborhood as winter would be so VERY bland without them.

I am so ready for the next season. I am ready for flip-flops and Capri pants. I’m ready for sitting in the backyard and soaking up the sun. I’m ready for a little color and vibrancy in life! The flowers of spring are always energizing and almost intoxicating as they change the landscape around us. Did you know to enjoy the tulips, daffodils, and hyacinths that I love so much…they actually must be planted in the fall before the first hard frost? They require the cold of winter to become what they are meant to be.

I wonder how that plays into my life? I feel like I have been in a hard winter for a while.   Even in the hard winter there have been those pops of green from the “evergreen trees” to keep life from being bland and too depressing.  I am so thankful for the “evergreen trees” in my life.  I am ready though for the next season; I’m ready for the vibrant colors and shapes of the spring flowers.  Just as God has designed and shaped the flowers that will soon be coming, I know he has a plan for me. I can’t wait to see the design.

Did you know that in the basal center portion of the bulb for all of those wonderful flowers are the leaves cradling a baby bud that is just waiting for spring?  In many of the species, this bud already has the appearance of a flower while still in the bulb!  Just like God has that plan already laid out for me.  The basic framework for the next season in my life is all there.  The winter was necessary to shape me into the woman he wants me to be.  He has had the plan all along and has just been waiting to reveal it to me when the time was right.

So until then, I keep trusting him and walking forward knowing that a change of seasons is near.

As for a taste of spring now, I made this pound cake when my younger daughter had a friend over that was staying for dinner.  The friend doesn’t drink milk so my original plan for the evening dessert, ice cream, was out.  I looked around my pantry and then found this recipe on the Duncan Hines website.  It was so yummy and moist.

 

Pineapple Orange Pound Cake

Preheat oven to 350°

Grease and flour a 10″ Bundt pan.

Combine together in a mixing bowl:

• 1 package of Duncan Hines Signature Pineapple Cake Mix
• 1 small package of vanilla instant pudding
• 4 large eggs
• 1 cup orange juice
• 1/3 cup vegetable oil
• 1 grated orange peel (about 1 Tablespoon)

Beat at medium speed with electric mixer for two minutes.

Pour into the prepared pan

Bake for 50 to 60 minutes or until a toothpick inserted inot the center comes out clean.

Cool for 25 minutes in pan and then invert onto a serving plate.

Make the glaze:

Combine in a small saucepan and then simmer for 3 minutes:

• 1/4 cup orange juice
• 1/3 cup sugar

Brush the warm glaze on the cake.

Enjoy!  The cake didn’t last 24 hours at my house.

 

Lesson From a Fruit Salad

Tonight we had a leftover fruit salad with our dinner.  The salad had pineapple, strawberries and raspberries in it.  I think I cut up the pineapple on Friday night to go with our pizza so the fruits have been hanging out together now for about 3 days.  When my younger daughter served her plate I said “not a fan of pineapple ehh?” to which she replied, “not when it has red on it”.

It was a good time to grab the moment and remind my girls that who we hang around with rubs off on us.  The raspberries and strawberries were making our yellow pineapple red.  Just like the friends we make and even the acquaintances we choose to spend time with will rub off on us.  Make sure you hang around those you wish to become more like.

Selling my house has ruined me

Yep you heard it…I am ruined.  That is R-U-I-N-E-D.

We have had our house on the market for a few months and we are so thankful that God has provided a buyer and that, pending appraisal, we will be moving on in our journey of life.

However, I have been ruined in the last few months.  My house has been clean.  It is de-cluttered.  It is vacuumed regularly.  The kitchen is clean and clear—even the sink!

.

Everything in place!

 

I have always loved a clean house…I mean really, who doesn’t.  But not many love to clean a house.  It takes work and discipline.

However, at the end of the day it feels so much better than staring at piles of papers, laundry and dishes.

I’ve learned that it does take time and effort.  Those two items are in short supply in my life but it takes less time and less effort to keep up with the clutter and cleaning.  You would think that it would not have taken me 41 years to realize this.  I always knew it in my head but I didn’t live it.

Taking time each day makes a world of difference in how my house looks.

It is like that with my time each day with the Lord.  When I take time daily to spend some moments with him it makes a world of difference in how my temple looks.  We are the temple of God, it says so in the New Testament in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 “Don’t you know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit? The Spirit is in you. You have received him from God.”  

When I take time to listen to him, talk to him and focus on him, it is amazing how much better I look.  Not in how I look physically but spiritually.  I am a better mom on the days I take time with the Lord, I’m a better wife, and I’m just better.  Why?  Because you become like those you spend time with.  Who wouldn’t want to be more and more like our Lord?  Don’t get me wrong….I have a LONG way to go to looking like the Lord.  But each day He refines me a bit more, He molds me and makes me into his vessel that reflects him.

So putting my house on the market has triggered not only the desire to have my physical house clean but my spiritual house clean too.  Each takes work but it is so worth it.

I started this post by saying that I was ruined.  Well, just to remind us all, ruined means: the physical destruction or disintegration of something or the state of disintegrating or being destroyed.  My routine of life was ruined when we put our house on the market: change of schedules to get the house ready to show, packing things away to clear up shelves and closets and many other little pieces picked away at.  However in the midst of that destruction, beautiful things have been created.  I have seen God work and move not only in the selling of our house, but also in my own life.  I am not the same person I was four months ago.  I never knew that I would be so glad to see something ruined!

 

I Heard That

Recently I’ve suffered several losses—-various types, all with different pain and grief.  When working through grief it can feel very lonely.  I have felt isolated.  I have great friends and family yet I get the sense that if I talk about everything as much as I desire or as often as it is on my mind that people will say “Get over it and get on with living.”

While I was having coffee with God this last week, I was reading in Psalms.  God directed me to this passage:

Psalm 38:9

Lord my every desire is known to You; my sighing is not hidden from you.

What wonderful words of assurance!  God knows every single desire.  He knows my desires for my family, my spiritual life, my finances—He knows it all!

He even hears my sighs.  When I feel all alone and think “no one remembers….does anyone care?”

Psalm 38:9 reminds me that God does— he heard that.  He hears every sigh and knows every thought.

So if you are experiencing thoughts of—no one cares and heave big sighs of “oh man this is tough”, God knows what is happening and what you are longing for.  He hears those sighs and the best part is that He has a plan and it is a plan to prosper you and not to harm you.  A plan to give you hope and a future.  How do I know this?  Because it says it in the Bible in the book of Jeremiah in chapter 29 verse 11.

After the most recent loss, let’s call it the loss of possibility, I got back into my car and I was a wreck.  I had been in a meeting and I was caught off guard by a friend.  The words said had been so unexpected. I was hurting and a big puddle of tears.  As I turned my car on, the stereo speakers sang out the words from the Jamie Grace song “Come to Me”

...Come to me when you are weary and I’ll give you hope when you’re hurting.

I’ll give you rest from your burden….

God heard my sighing.  He knew exactly what I was going through.  He was right there.  He saw me hurting and sent the words in the song to me to remind me that He will give me hope and a future.

 

Have you found yourself sighing lately?

Are you dealing with loss of some sort?

 

Take some time today to talk with God about those things that you are grieving about.  Tell him how you feel.  He cares.  He will listen.

Then remind yourself of the promises He has given about your future and trust him to fulfill those very promises.

He will.

He always does—-in His time.